One Year

May 3, 2012 at 12:06 AM (Cancer, Energy, Faith, Family, kids, Real Life, Silver Lining, Zen) (, , , , , , )

May 1, 2011, The Feather Family

Today marked the last day of the year. One year of time that has been spent on an incredible journey of self-reflection. One year since Sarah, The Carcinista, died.

In many ways, this year has been amazing. Our boys and I have learned some wonderful life skills. Not just for coping with the hard things, but for really building a good life in a new way. Many things have remained the same by design. But we have also set out to create a life that works for the three of us. A life that (I believe) Sarah would be pleased with, and proud of.

We all have come to a place of peace about where she is, and how she is still in our lives. That took time, but maybe less time for us than it could have taken. Sarah gave us all permission to come to peace, and to be able to move forward in a good way. We are embracing that as a family.

May 3, 2012 is not a sad day. At least not any more sad than any other day this week or next week or last week. We’ve come to cherish our memories of Sarah and how we were a family. We talk about Sarah at the dinner table, while driving to school, at bed time. Really, whenever it feels right. I often say to the boys how proud Sarah would be to see them with all they have  accomplished. They like that. And, of course, I tell them how proud I am of them as well.

I asked the boys if they would like to have a special dinner to remember Mommy on the anniversary of her death. They both smiled, and at the exact same time blurted out, “We want ice cream for dinner!”  So, we’re having ice cream. Super Mom is joining us as well. We’ll be spending some special time thinking about Sarah and talking about our wonderful memories. We’ll light some candles in her honor. And, as usual, finish the evening reading some books before the kids go to sleep.

So, if you feel like having a little time to remember our hero. Maybe you, too can eat some ice cream. Light a candle. And settle in to a good book.


Mr. Wonderful


  1. cancerfree2b said,

    Dear Mr. Wonderful,

    I am going to have some ice cream right now (getting out of bed to have a at least a spoonful after having read your blog post).

    Thank you for sharing a little bit of what your year has been like.

    There are many of us who never met Sarah, not in person, just through her words . . . but, what words, such wit, such brilliance. And your posts, Mr. Wonderful, were so beautiful, to get to know more about Sarah through your writing was such a gift.

    Thank you for sharing then and now.


    • Connie Wonham said,

      Well put, Lisa. You are a beautiful writer, and I read every word. Sarah’s legacy is amazing and powerful. Thank you for continuing to share it.

      • cancerfree2b said,

        Connie, thank you. How sweet. I think of Sarah often – though we never met. And, I think of her family. It was so nice to read Mr. Wonderful’s post.

  2. Jennifer said,

    I will dedicate my class this morning to Sarah. You have made such a peaceful transition, and you are showing others how they might move forward with a beautiful vision. We will have ice cream in her honor as well, and as always, snuggle with a good book at the end of the day.
    Be well Feathers & Great Julie,

  3. wendyrodger45 said,

    Ice cream will be eaten and sassy shoes will be worn (even in the rain) down here in Rhode Island. Missing Sarah and so thankful Tori and I were able to say good-bye. I think of her all the time and I know she would be so proud of you and the boys. Oh and of course Harry will be streaming on Pandora all day xoxo

  4. Ellen said,

    A lovely post. 🙂

  5. Nancy's Point said,

    Mr. wonderful,
    This is so beautiful and poignant. I’m very touched. Thinking of you all.

  6. Kim ostien said,

    Love this post. Loooove this post. We are going out to the same restaurant for dinner as we did last may 3rd. I will order my guiness and drink with the hand that bears the ovac bracelet I bought to remember Sarah. So……icre cream? We’re going to have this after school. All of us. And bed time stories-we do this everynight but tonight it will be all together and dedicated to Sarah. Smiles to you. You’re truly a remarkable human being.

  7. Chemobabe said,

    I will make sure to have ice cream tonight. I will light a little candle for you, Sarah, and your beautiful boys.

  8. Maggie said,

    Amen, Mr. Wonderful.

  9. The Accidental Amazon said,

    I will definitely be adding ice cream and candles to my day. And thinking of you all.

  10. Boston Mamas (@bostonmamas) said,

    Hugs and tears, Ed.

  11. uvmer said,

    Ice cream for everyone! You are living up to your name in an amazing way. Love to you and the boys.

  12. pfbrick said,

    Thank you for the beautiful post and for sharing your strength with us.. My boys and I will eat ice cream, take our evening walk and, as we read our bedtime book, I will remind them how truly blessed we are and that Sarah is watching over us, as we continue to draw upon her strength and courage. You all remain in our thoughts and prayers.. xx’s, patricia

  13. MommaDukes said,

    May God Bless you and the boys. Sarah was such an inspiration to me during her illness and she will always be missed by all the Teal survivors she touched. Ice cream tonight sounds wonderful…

  14. Heather said,

    You are an inspiration to all families touched by this disease. Keep the posts coming. Ice cream sounds good.

  15. Rebecca said,

    You and the boys have moved through a heartwrenchingly difficult year with a grace that is rarely found but is truly admirable. Sarah would be more than proud, I suspect…I think she’d be awed. Thinking of all of you.

  16. Ada said,

    You are an amazing courageous man Ed,I am proud to know you. I send my love. Ada

  17. Alix Jacobs said,

    I am on it. love to all, special hugs.and to julie xoxoox

  18. katrhi said,

    She was a courageous lady!

  19. Sue Mellusi said,

    I stopped and picked up ice cream on the way home today, and am eating it now. Hugs to you, Julie, and the boys…thinking of you all 🙂

  20. Meredith Sterner said,

    Wow. I have so much to be thankful and grateful for. Thank you for sharing your story. I remember Sarah from Dickinson. I am in awe of her courage and strength and your courage and faith as well. Know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

  21. Andrea Martinez said,

    I went to Ben and Jerry’s and had coffee ice cream in honor of Sarah, after reading this heartwarming post of such an AMAZING family♥

  22. Betty said,

    Thank you……………….

  23. ET61 said,

    She was a courageous lady and desperately loved her boys and you, Mr. Wonderful.

  24. Cat said,

    Hello Mr. Wonderful and boys!
    Yes, Sarah sure would be proud!! I remember her on the inspire site and all the raw courage and humor she could muster through her blogs.
    She was as real as she could be and described her experiences through her journey as if you were a close friend or sister. She was a wonderful writer and always had something interesting and informative to say. I miss her and so do many others.

    Sarah has definitely left her mark and it’s wonderful that she had a man like you to have loved her and cared for her so much.
    Best to you and your boys.

  25. said,

    My four year old and two year old were super excited for their ice cream. And I was grateful to have some fun with my kids. Thanks for the perspective and update. Blessings to your family.

  26. Alli said,

    Ice Cream it is, Miss Lucy the Cat will join me….. Candles too…… Beautiful One Year Tribute…. Thank You….Alli…….

  27. Nic said,

    I can’t believe it’s been over a year. Thank you so much for your continued posts. Warm regards from yet another stranger who admired Sarah.

  28. Kyle McFisher from Overlander Mountain Lodge said,

    You make me cry!

  29. Barbara said,

    I am not sure you are still getting these messages but I am just stopping by to say I am thinking about your family this week. Time makes it easier to breathe but we never stop missing the people that have died. Sending love to all of you.

    • Sarah said,

      Thank you Barbara. Yes, I still get them when they come in. Just slower at getting onto the blog to reply. Sorry. Thank you for thinking of us.

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